Tuesday, August 26, 2008

I wish the word quavers still only meant crisps to me...


Man learning drums actually is a bitch, playing by ear is so much easier thean counting your bars and beats and crotchets and quavers and...oh gawd...

1. Wales is essentially Ireland. Think about it...its got crappy uphill twisty roads, lots of greenery but nothing to actually do. The only difference is that everyone has a picture of christian bale in their wallet in a heart shape frame and loves randonmly screaming CYMRU!!! Also when it rains it rains in biblical proportions.

2. Irelands rain is very confused. Kind of like a gay man who crossdresses..like are you a "woman" who likes men or are you just a man liking men??..light rain...ohhh heavy flooding rain...ohh sunny ah we got you not really its still drizzling.Damn rain.

3. I need a really good salesman to sell me the idea that commuting for 2 hours to dcu every day is going to be a good idea..well any salesmen willing to take up the challenge? Note: I will only accept offers from salesmen dressed in cheap tweed jackets with a smoking pipe in their massive white teeth (like in the movies!!)

4. I think ill get myself a cageman hairstyle cos as we all know the mullet thats hasnt been washed in a while is now back in fashion.

5. If you want a uniform for your son or daughter please dont come in on the day before school starts at closing time and the give out to me because inevtiably I will suddenly run out of your childs size.

6. Laptop advice: Never ask for any!

7. Subways new deal is the subcard.Very glossy and a nice wallet filler certainly. To get a free sub you must have 1000 points.Every euro is 10 points (ok here comes the technical part) now 1000 divided by 10 is 100. so thats 100 euro for a free sub. now 100 euro worth o sub is roughly 14 footlong subs. Now that is twice my height in subs and two days work...at that stage i dont think id want a sub....damn that was some calculations i think a need a suub..

8. The Hss stena line sure is a motherflipin testosterone fueled manyl shop of death. However the "lynx"while doing an impressive 38 knoths per hour is also impressivey gay. Oh llok at me im the stenal lynx im so small and so gay, i Just love having all these sailors on me at the one time. It was that gay that I had to christen it... FAGGOT SHIP!

9. Crunch fitness is by far th mot over the top place I have ever been in. I mean dico balls over the treadmill?like ok the moonwalk is a dance and exercise but.. ah who am i kidding its juts 'uckin ridicoulous.

10. I wish lemonade would be cheaper!

2 comments:

Ash said...

I can comment now. yay! Hilarious as usual. BANGKOK DANGEROUS!

Nirina said...

hey! Crunch Fitness is ridiculous, but yoo forgot to mention how cool it is too!!!
xx