Saturday, October 18, 2008

Jtown moments that are now to be cemented into Internet immortality!!

I usually dont have the title of the blog befor I write it but this was an exception and so you are guarenteed that this post will be off the wall!! (see what i did with the pun on wall there eh eh?
were gonna kick it off in chronological order but I imagine that will have been lost by number two or three. Not that anyone will really notice...anyway on with the blog!!

1. Me skating round the estate extremly fast on his skateboard with his jacket blowing behind him trying to get the attention of Bryan and farrell.

2. This happened the first time sean and I ever met
Sean: Hi my name is sean. What the crack man?
Karl: Hi im karl. im gay....
sean: oh....ok....

3. The first two xmas's we spent in the town of J it snowed, this lead to multiple events of hilarity.
A. Myself and Oisin ran around to Kellys and were throwing snowballs when in the distance we heard the annoying hum of Shanes moped."The smell of burberry is thick in the air" I said. We took our positions behind the wall,aimed and hit the guy on the front and the guy on the back of the moped with snowballs.Classic.
B. Bryan and Paul saw the little kids making their little snowman.They waited...they had all the time in the world. Then as the kids finshed it off and went inside for a minute they made their move. Paul smashing the head in of the snowman as if it was a scumbag followed by bman kickin the body of the snowman to a pulp. You dont mess with the Harris's.
C. The whole posse was having a snowball fight in my front garden when as always I went to far and got bryan in the face with an iceball. Bryan chased me down and after some skilful eeling by me he pushed me and i fell staright on my face. that particular fall went down in history.

4. The days of skating woodies with the big gaffer!!

5. Sean climbing the scaffolding at woodies and having to drop 14 feet only to sketch it.

6.The posse cycle myself oisin and bryan went on just after getting to know one another out to Jeffs house. Ah that was all haha yeah i dont know you guys but like this is cool.

7. Oisin being introduced by his mother like a kid who has no friends in a playschool. Im sorry ush that was just hurtful..

8. Bryans neighbour..what a dick!

9. Bushjumping in the dead of night from the back of the estate all the way out of the estate that was a gauntlet.

10.Me and Bryans epic 300 recreation using old crappy pearl cymbals. THIS IS JOHNSTOWN!! I was equipped with a filthy persian knife and a longbow...Bryan on the other hand had a baseball bat.So yeah I took some long range shots and got him nicely as well as epic blocking with his cymbal shield but in close quarters bryan just whacked me with the bat and that was me finished.

11. Urban destructo ball wth ush, always a luagh and always DESTRUCTIVE!!

12.Oisin nearly dying from malnutrition and over training..that was only really funny in retrospect..

13. doing seans homework in the scum mobile.Me and the sean just siting in the back of the scum mobile chatting and solving 2nd year maths equations.

14. The scum mobile coming out and hunting sean like some kind of stazi patrol vehicle. It would park on the green and dispatch an elite team of small children specially trained to hunt sean (i.e his brothers and sisters).

15. Me and bryan snook sean out of his when he was grounded with an ingenious plan.
Sean: This is ridicoulous, this will never work!
Karl and Bryan: Shut up and get in the whellbarrow of course it will work.
We then put our jackets over sean in the wheelbarrow and rolled sean down the street whistling as if whistling made it less obvious.

16. Bin of wonder!! Leaving oisin at someones door in a wheelie bin only to ring the door bell and runaway. Up pops oisin at the persons door.!hilarious.

This could go on forever now that I think of it because there is 4 years worth of material..but we shall go to 25.

17. We have many accents over the years. I mean loads:
A. Engling: Oi mate bring the baas there oiiii!!
B. Scanger: Scarle' for ya chicken! douvi'
C. Deco: Ah yeah f-f-f-f-f-f-f-fine machine!
D. Unknown: down the stow oh yeah get some of that into yahhh up the yard!
E. Wigga: What you playin at fool?
F. Mc Hawking: gta 3 is like the sims to me, a real life simulator cos thats where id be

18. Singing and quoting flight of the conchords and mc hawking at any possible moment.

19. Bryan and oisin coming home from amazing holidays full of adventure...and then telling you nothing for months.

20. Sean: I had it out for ages.......big yellow gates.

21.Running up the matrix hill outside jtown gardens humming some generic stunt music.

22. Playing footy with the latvians and havin martin and janis destroy us everytime.

23. Janises going home party. Heart breaking and full of emotions but the best fun i think I have ever had. Running around tying people up in tissue paper,dancing in the kitchen, footy at like on the green waking up brenda donoghue.

24. 360 flipping the 3 set!!!!haha

25. Doing ridicoulously stupid things in centra is just part of how we spend time in jtown. Here are some examples:
A. Dancing in the aisles to the horrible choice of music that centra always have.
B. Getting free ice cream from seanie or getting anything free. Or in some cases just plain stealing like the pick and mix is just to easy.
C. Stealing cosmo and finding out that oisin is a Cosmo dick which in recent times has been proven time and time again.
D. Playing with the toys they have in there, that was classic.
E. In the early days buying callipos and chilling in front f centra on their tables with tim buying us loads of free shit.
F. My favourite centra moment though was when me an oisin got on my gas mask and pumkin head mask and went in and scared the shit out of time. He nearly pressed the panic button when he saw us.

26. Being uber schmad in Seans, just like the english accent thing does this make us actually mad now?

Good Times!!

Saturday, October 11, 2008

One liners, Tv liscences and as always commuting!

Commuters out there, you all need to take a crash course in logic!

1. The luas, for the record, is not actually a record breaking attempt to see how many people you can squash into a confined area. I felt that I actually had to clarify this after my recent experience. "oh look theres hardly any room on that luas..ah sure i could fit in there". When people are oiling themselves up to try and slip onto the luas you know its too packed, just get the next one!!

2.College basketball is as hard as they make it look in all great American Films.

3. I'd love to meet the T.V liscence inspector and try and think of an excuse he hasnt heard. It Would be epic, Karl Vs. Faceless Government inspector on top of mount vesuvious. I would battle him with ridicoulous excuses such as "I had one but then i shoved it up the last inspectors hole!!". Then we would battle with those gladiator poles over the volcanoe...These are just things I think of when I hear that ad.

4. Fanta Exotic is like travelling to a tropical island in your mouth...but then you get to the end of it and see the chemical scum on the bottom of the bottle, so its more like going to a tropical island where chemical waste is dumped...Still damn tasty though.

5. some girl in college said I sound american. Geez guys I dont sound like totally American do I?

6. I have now compiled a Kidnapping list (with the help of ash). Below is that list with the reason for kidnapping:

1. Rise against: Damn their infectious anger punk is just handy to have whenever you want it.

2. Horatio Caines Glasses: In an ideal situation I would kidnap Horatio himself but then i thought for a second and realised that he would just arrest with me with a slick line and id never get away with it.

3. Natalie Portman and Keira Knightley: For interesting mudfights and extravagant entrys to parties with them on both arms. ( in fairness to ash she had nothing to do with this one).

4. Flight of the conchords: Imagine instant humour, they make it a possibility.

7. One of my most recent and favourite country type one liners I thought of is: "Just like Ruby Walsh, I dont ride losers!"

8. My phone broke while writing this blog. Why does every techonological thing I touch just break? I am like a human computer virus.